


Two Guys in a Pond, One Foot Apart Because They're Stinky.

by KatzeDrachen7



Category: Hyrule Warriors: Age of Calamity (Video Game), The Legend of Zelda: Breath of the Wild
Genre: Anal Sex, Astor and Link are stinky and need a bath., Bath Sex, Blow Jobs, Loving Marriage, M/M, One Shot, Orgasm Delay/Denial, sexy times ensue
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-01
Updated: 2021-01-01
Packaged: 2021-03-10 20:28:32
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,299
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28483158
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/KatzeDrachen7/pseuds/KatzeDrachen7
Summary: (A epilogue for "The Intertwining of Light and Dark". https://archiveofourown.org/works/28410243)Link and Astor make a late-night journey to the Heart Break Pond for a much-needed bath. Of course Astor has other ideas...
Relationships: Link/Astor
Kudos: 6





	Two Guys in a Pond, One Foot Apart Because They're Stinky.

The full moon rose above the Necluda sea, spreading its silver vail across the mountains. The pale light reflected off of Link’s Hylian shield as Link stood atop the cliffside. He gazed across the lush green mountains and towards the ever-rising moon above. Thankfully the celestial body wasn’t bleeding with crimson malice that night. With Ganon subdued, blood moons had become a rare occurrence. Link sighed as he stretched his arms and turned to face his lover. Astor struggled up to the cliffside with an indigent huff. His ragged cape blowing behind him like a tattered pair of wings. The seer pulled his hood back, allowing the breeze to kiss his malice scarred face. Even with only one eye, Astor was still just as expressive, and cunning, as ever. He approached Link with a smirk and brushed his lieth hand across Link’s broad shoulder.  
“Sorry to keep you waiting my love. I just needed to finish my latest paper.” Astor gave Link a gentle pat on the back, brushing his lips against the hylian’s pointed ear.  
“No worries my love, I’ve just been enjoying the beautiful view. I’m sure Robbie will find your work of great use. Just remember to use your pen name.”  
“Of course I will Link, I’ve been staying hidden for this long, I don’t plan on changing that!” Astor chuckled throatily. He joined Link in his stargazing, his trained eye easily picking out the constellations above.  
’I see it is a full moon tonight. A good omen perhaps.” He purred. Link nodded in agreement. Astor had been researching the moon and its many phases as of late. Long nights of frenzied research had given the seer little time to bathe. It took many hints, nudges, and ultimately arguments to get him to wash. Astor dragged his heels on the idea and only agreed to Link’s demands so long as he joined him and they bathed at the Broken Pond. Why they couldn’t just bathe in the nearby pond at their house, Link could only guess.  
They gazed off over the Necluda skyline before heading off. The two exchanged few words, opting to only take in the sights and sounds of the wild. Link stared at Astor’s normally obscured hair. Without anyone but themselves in the area, Astor was far more comfortable showing his wounded face. His coal-black hair had grown long and wild due to a lack of care. Thin braids weaved in and around his locks, each one tipped with small Gerudo beads. As if aware of Link’s prying eyes, Astor turned to his lover.  
“I take it you have the soap bars, yes? You’re scrunching your nose up as if I have a dead kees on my head.”  
“Of course, I have all of the needed toiletries.” Link held up the leather sack with the supplies with a smirk. “I wouldn’t just forget why we walked for almost three hours.” He exclaimed with an exasperated sigh. Astor nodded in approval before turning back towards the mountain.  
“I know you don’t wish to travel all this way, but I feel far more comfortable here. Such peace and quiet were hard to come by in Hateno. You wouldn’t deny your husband of that now would you?” His baritone voice was soft as silk, yet quick as a viper. Link could listen to it for hours.  
They arrived at the top of the mountain at the moon’s zenith. Link jogged up to the pond’s edge, ogling at the crystal clear water. The pond was ringed by cool grey stones, shielding the waters from the cool breeze. A jagged strip of rock cleaved through shimmering waters, giving it its namesake. Link and Astor both sighed with relief and started unpacking their bags.  
“This best be worth it Astor! If this isn’t the coolest, most refreshing bath I have ever had, you’ll be cooking your own food for a month!” Link threatened, albeit mostly jokingly. His feet did ache a fair bit though, and he had sweated up a river during their hike. He reckoned that Astor was in the same boat. The seer breathed in the fresh mountain air, before loosening the clasps of his mantle.  
“Oh I’m sure the water is perfectly serviceable you grouchy moblin! Besides, it’s my job to whinge and moan here, not yours.” Astor gave him a rare smile. His pale gums and thin grey lips encircled surprisingly white teeth. The flesh along the right side of his cheek had long since peeled away from incessant picking and decay, revealing the inside of his mouth. The malice had melded into the soft grey skin, twisting it horribly. Link no longer flinched at the sight of his love’s marred visage, nor did Astor feel the need to hide his appearance. Link returned the smile as he sauntered off to one end of the pond. Astor’s topaz hued eye followed the young hero with lustful intent. Deep down, they both knew why they wanted to be secluded from prying eyes...  
Link began the process of removing his clothes. He was happy that he ditched his armor in favour of some simple Hylian garments. The hero unbuckled the leather pauldron and vest, casting it aside without a thought. A pair of worn leather gauntlets and some muddy boots joined the pile of discarded clothes. Link started pulling off his red tunic, happy to be free of the sweat-soaked cloth. Next was the belt and trousers. Astor had recently repaired them after Link tore through the knee padding in a cycling accident. To be fair, he would have shattered his legs if he hadn’t made the knee guard in the first place. Ultimately, the new pads were far better, seeing as Astor had a knack for mending as much as he did spell casting. After much wiggling and pulling, Link was left only in his undergarments. The rocky outcrop shielded him from the harsh mountain air. He thanked Hylia softly for the protection, before checking over his shoulder.  
On the other side of the pond, Astor was mirroring Link’s actions. He had opted to take the bare minimum amount of jewellery. The fear of theft overtook his love of being adorned in Gerudo gold. The seer had already cast aside his mantle and top robe, exposing his embroidered undershirt and cotton pants. He had practically made most of his clothes. Such old garments did tend to break down easily after all. Astor gazed down at his recently crafted gauntlet. A fine mix of crochet wool, soft cow leather, and a Gerudo linen wrap. The gauntlet was not meant to protect, but hide the hand beneath it. Astor gingerly loosened the strap and pulled off the gauntlet.  
Dead, blackened tissue lay beneath the wool, its texture cracked and horribly warped by malice. Only three fingers were left, with the pointer finger missing its last joint. The other fingers were paralyzed completely, left forever locked in a twisted black shell. Astor stroked the dead flesh with a somber expression etched on his equally disfigured face. Ganon’s malice had most certainly left him marred for life. Despite his disabilities and grotesque appearance, Link still fell for the seer. Such a strange, yet wondrous young man. So lean and strong, yet also swift and sure-footed. Astor could only dream of such physical prowess. At the thought of his husband’s chiselled physique, Astor turned and glanced over at his lover.  
Link let out a sigh of relief as the cool water lapped at his heels. It was the perfect temperature for a long, relaxing soak. He waded into the water, holding the soap and washcloth in his toned arms. The young man lathered the cloth with the gooseberry scented soap. He eyed Astor as the seer replicated his actions. They both admired each other from afar. Astor strategically turned to clean under his arms, showcasing his lean, almost bony shoulders. His mutilated, twisted right arm was held out stiffly; the gnarled claws twitching slightly. Their many adventures had left both of the men battle-scarred and toned. Astor still wasn’t terribly muscular himself, but Link’s fine cooking and training had bestowed upon the seer an attractive leanness. Link couldn’t help but be mesmerized by the display of delicate anatomy. The seer gently cleansed his wounded flank, each rib clearly outlined below the scarred flesh. He ran a slender hand lathered in soap from his armpit to his thigh. Leaning down to scrub his legs, Astor showed off his surprisingly supple arse. Only a Gerudo undergarment hid his soft manhood. Link licked his lips, not caring how licentious he looked.  
Astor smirked as he felt Link’s lustful gaze upon his back. The young man certainly did a poor job at hiding his gawking.  
“Are you still scrubbing up back there Link?” Astor crooned, another thin smile gracing his pale face. Link immediately blushed,  
“O-of course I am! I’m just quiet about it.” He sputtered out, rather flustered. Astor knew exactly what he was doing to him. “Figures that a fortune teller would be skilled at allurement” he muttered. If Astor heard him, he wasn’t letting on. Link glanced at the full moon. It was still a ways off from sunrise. If he really wanted to take Astor’s hint, then he wouldn’t be pressed for time.  
“Hey Astor, want to try some of this gooseberry soap? You can come over and I can give it to you.” Link waved the violet bar of soap up in the air, teasing Astor with its sweet scent.  
“Well I’m quite tempted by your offer honey, but I am quite content with the lavender soap, unless you meet me in the middle, literally.” The seer had that wicked gleam in his eye, belaying his darker side. Link knew that he was going to have to play along if he wanted anything out of this. Astor cocked his head to the side, one braid dangling lazily in front of his angular face. He paced around the clear waters, making sure to show off his assets.  
Link rolled his eyes as he adjusted his blue boxers.  
“You don’t need to prance about like a prized mare Astor, you already have my interest.”  
“Well if you are truly intrigued, then you would stop testing my patience and come closer.” Astor tipped his chin up and waged his finger, his topaz eye sizing his lover up.  
Link wadded up to the jagged outcrop that slashed the pond in half. Astor sauntered up to join him, the water leaving shimmering rivets across his pale skin. Link held out the soap with a smirk.  
“Well, you have me where you want me. Now, what is that evil plan that you have cooking in there?” He strode up to Astor until they were mere inches from each other. The seer’s scent was already more bearable than what it was an hour ago. Link inhaled the alluring aroma. A mix of silky lavender, sharp parchment, and a rich earthy musk met Link’s nose. Astor could smell a similar mixture of scents, breathing it in with a blissful sigh.  
“Do you wish for me to lather you with this? I can tell you want to be pampered.” Link exclaimed in a slightly sardonic tone. Astor chuckled, the sound nearly melodic. He took the soap from Link’s hand and closed his eye. He inhaled the aroma once more, before nonchalantly tossing the bar aside.  
“I don’t need soap for this little ritual.” Link feigned ignorance and batted his sky blue eyes coyly.  
“Ritual? A ritual of lustful ardor perhaps?”  
“Now you are starting to grasp my intentions Link,” Astor growled, drawing even closer to his knight in shimmering armor. Their chests were practically touching at that point. Link could feel the seer’s breathing in harmony with his. He pressed the cool, soap soaked cloth to Astor’s malice scarred cheek, dabbing gingerly at the flayed skin. Link caressed the unsullied side with his free hand, gently stroking the sharp cheekbone. Astor purred softly, leaning into his husband’s sweet touches.  
They finally embraced under the cool moonlight. Link planted a few gentle kisses on Astor’s prominent collarbone before pressing his lips to the seer’s. They entangled their tongues and lapped at each other’s lips. Long, nimble fingers wrapped around his tabantha wheat hued hair. He felt around Astor’s flank, running his hands up and down his lythe ribs. In turn, Astor fondled his well-muscled back, dragging his sharp nails along his scared scapula. Link casually flicked his thumb over the seer’s dark nipple. His breath hitched with the sensation and he licked his pale lips. Link stroked the sensitive bud of flesh again, gently pulling at it. He pressed his supple lips to the skin and suckled at his breast. His lover mewled softly and savored the sensual sensations. Calloused fingers pinched roughly at Astor’s sensitive flesh, causing him to release a low growl of discontent. He tightened his grip on Link’s soft hair and pulled him away from his breast.  
“Hmph, you are teasing me again Link. Stop toying with my breast and start cleaning other regions.” Link nodded in agreement, moving the washcloth down to his lover’s nether regions.  
“Well, I think your twin stars need a gentle wash.” Link purred, tickling Astor under the chin.  
“Eager to get to my treasure are we?” He chuckled. Once Link was aroused, it was hard to stop him.  
“Well, I can tell you’re also rather eager to get on with things.” Link smirked as he gestured to Astor’s growing erection. It noticeably distended the purple silk. A stain had slowly grown on the purple cloth. Suddenly, Link grabbed hold of the bulge, firmly running his thumb over the tip. The seer let out a breathy moan.  
“Ahh, By Din you should warn me before you just grab that!” His pale face flushed pink with embarrassment and lust. Link simply laughed, a melodic, tinkling tune. He eased up on the fondling and knelt down to remove the Gerudo undergarments.  
Astor’s long, thin penis jumped free of the golden waistband. The creased plum head quivered and leaked onto the rocks. Link flicked his tongue along the sensitive skin, lapping up the precum. He took the washcloth and ran it along one of the thin, throbbing veins. The member jumped a bit in his hand as Link took the warm head in his mouth. He gently nipped the foreskin, pulling it back. Link could taste the seer’s pulse in his mouth, throbbing away. Astor bit back a whimper as Link took his long member up in both hands and massaged the shaft. He instinctively bucked his hips into the titillating sensation. Primal pleasure built up in his groin. With near expert precision, Link worshipped Astor’s cock. Such skilled hands befitted a hero of legend as much as they did a royal concubine.  
“By Din yes! I crave your touch my love!” Astor panted, the pressure in his core nearing its climax. He bucked harder into Link’s mouth, no longer bothering to stifle his moans and cries. Just as the seer was about the bequeath his seed, Link ceased his worship.  
“Gu-ghrrrrh, why did you stop?” Astor snarled, his good ear twitching in annoyance.  
“Well I wish to have a bit of fun too. Don’t be such a whore hog Astor.” Link slapped his husband’s supple arse. He knew Astor wasn’t truly upset, the seer’s thin lips upturned slightly.  
“You wish to penetrate me I assume?” Link nodded excitedly. Astor sighed and feigned indignation.  
“Fine then, have it your way!” He snarled. Astor got down on his hands and knees, making sure to hold his plump arse aloft. Link copped a feel, running his precum slicked fingers from the taint to the tailbone.  
“My, aren’t we feeling confident?” Link knelt down and purred into his ear. Seeing his lover so comfortable in his imperfect body was a turn-on all of its own. He gently squeezed the pale grey skin, eliciting a groan from Astor.  
“I appreciate the worshipping of my body Link, but I would doubly enjoy being railed right now.”  
Link sighed as he positioned his still clothed groin at Astor’s quivering entrance.  
“Er, honey… you have to take off your undergarments.” He exclaimed with a hint of amusement mixed in with exasperation. Astor turned around on his knees and faced Link’s crotch. He reached around using his good arm and pulled down the boxers. Link yelped when he felt the cold air graze his manhood. Despite not being as long as his lover’s, his cock was still rather impressive in its own way. Astor wrapped his long fingers around the shaft, barely touching his thumb to his pointer finger.  
“Exquisite…” He growled as he massaged the crimson head. Astor felt his climax growing at just thought of being railed by Link’s “sword”. The seer lathered the girthy member with the washcloth, the soap lubricating the shaft. Sweet, gooseberry foam dripped down from Link’s impressive scrotum. Astor gently wiped off some of the foam,  
“Mmmh… yeeees…” Link moaned softly. “Now turn around, I want to feed that slutty hole of yours.”  
With his manhood properly lubricated, Link placed his cock at Astor’s throbbing ring. He rubbed his uncircumcised head against the rim, teasing the seer.  
“Get on with it I implore you!” He whined, bucking into his husband’s penis.  
“Haha, fine I’ll fuck you now.” Link gave his lover a hardy spank on the rump before slowly working his way in. Both jolted when his penis suddenly pushed through the ring and slammed into Astor’s bundle of nerves.  
“AAH! Aahhrg...By Din be careful back there!” Astor panted, his wounded arm shaking under his weight.  
“S-sorry! Are you hurt?” Link leaned over and planted some kisses on his husband’s sharp scapula.  
“I’m fine, just was taken off guard. That area is my weakness and you know it.”  
“Ha! As is your belly!” Link rushed in and came in for a surprise tummy tickle. Astor almost asphyxiated himself from laughter. His arms finally gave out and he could only lay there and take the young man’s relentless tickles. What a strange turn of fate it was seeing the mighty Prophet of Doom laid bare and brought down by mere tickling.  
“Huff huff… enough! Pant, I’m going to pass out if you keep it up!”  
“Fine I’ll stop. Besides, you’ll pass out anyways once I start railing you!” Link gave him a final belly rub, feeling out the abdominal muscles and fine hairs around his naval.  
Link turned Astor onto his left side, careful not to let any rocks grate at the seer’s injured right arm and flank. He took hold of one pale leg and draped it over his toned shoulder. His other hand firmly stroked Astor’s flagging member, quickly returning it to full mast. Astor lay back, his eye fluttering shut as he took in the wondrous and warm sensations in his groin. Such sweet moments were ones to be savoured above all else. The seer could feel the heat of Link’s member at his now loosened orifice. Precum dripped down onto his taint. This time around Link made sure to carefully guide his cock into his lover’s anus. They made eye contact for a moment, and Astor nodded in consent. Seeing his final sign of approval, Link slid in with a sigh. Astor softly moaned and readjusted his hips as to better accommodate the hero’s impressive girth. They started off slow and deliberate as they always did; Link knew he had to keep things controlled at the start, lest he upset his partner in crime. He looked down at the prone seer, his mascara rimmed eye was closed and his mouth opened ever so slightly. Such a visage was one of pure bliss and near lechery. Low throating growls emitted from Astor’s throat, occasionally interrupted by sharp gasps and cries whenever Link brushed against that bundle of nerves. He adjusted his position inside of the seer, lifting his slim leg higher and pushing Astor’s head into the ground.  
“Ow! Watch how much weight you put on my skull!”  
“Sorry, I’m just trying to get a good downward movement without dislocating something.” Link huffed, his thighs aching from the strange position they were being forced into. Finally, he decided it would be better to just go in “wolf style”.  
“Just get on your hands and knees as you did earlier my love.” He exclaimed, taping Astor on the rump.  
“If that is what it takes for you to not break the mood, so be it.” Astor rolled his topaz eye and got into position. He pushed his arse against Link’s leaking cock, none too subtle about his impatience.  
Link resumed his thrusts from a better vantage point. The night air soon was filled with a symphony of obscene moans, laboured gasps, and the meaty slap of flesh on flesh. Astor was already starting to feel his arousal growing out of control, he gnarled right hand clawing at the cool rocks below. His long, leaking manhood sprayed precum and smeared the seer’s angular torso. Link moved his grip from Astor’s gaunt hips to his shoulders, digging his nails into the skin. The right shoulder and scapula were crisscrossed by ragged streaks of malice, creating a strange yet beautiful lattice. He planted a kiss in between the seer’s shoulder blades as he quickened his thrusts. The hastening tempo caused both men pant and moan with ecstasy. Link wrapped a well-muscled arm around his lover’s chest, ghosting his fingers over a nipple. Astor let out a strangled cry, the pressure in his loins growing to an unbearable heat. He reached his uninjured hand down to his throbbing manhood and started pumping it. Precum leaked onto his nimble grey fingers as Astor neared his peak. Each powerful thrust into his core caused the seer’s mind to reel. Wave after wave of relentless ecstasy bore down upon him like a savage sea. If this was what it was like to lose control, then perhaps he could stand to do so more often.  
Link was also quickly approaching his climax, his thrusts starting to lose their deliberate tempo. His handsome face was flushed with blood and his mind was taken over by primal urges. The man below him was equally far gone. They both were beyond rational thought at that moment, yet still trusted each other. A wordless agreement that they had both made on their first night in Hateno after the wedding was over. Such an agreement of trust was one held in high esteem and that they would never break it. Link dug his rather unrefined fingernails into Astor’s sevlte shoulder, drawing out some maroon droplets. The seer didn’t even acknowledge the wound, only moaning and keening into the rocks. Astor’s hand was almost a blur, his slender phallus squirting and quivering. He feverishly bucked into his precum soaked hand, the intense euphoria leaving the prophet slavering like a wild beast. Above him, Link keened and panted. Each thrust sent tendrils of lightning through his groin. His manhood throbbed within the seer’s tight cavity. He could feel Astor’s hole tightening around him as the seer started to climax.  
The intense throbbing of the seer’s sphincter brought Link over the edge. Tears welled up in his eyes as he released his impressive load. Immense waves of ecstasy struck him, leaving the young man’s conscience fluttering in the wind. Such intense sensations left Link almost agonizing lust. To ground himself, he sank his teeth into Astor’s lean trapezius. The prophet paid him no mind, his eyes closed and his mouth hanging open. His left hand massaged his member with a frantic feverence; cum starting splattering the cool rocks below. Gritting his teeth to the point of straining his jaw, Astor ejaculated all over his chest. The rain of seed tapered off with each thrust, wetting the prophet’s naval and thighs. He could only manage a horse cry as his body gave out from pure exhaustion. Panting and coughing, Astor stroked the last few drops of semen from his now flagging erection. His loins gently ached from their contents being spilt. Link was also starting to slow down, his thrusts becoming weak humps. The hero released his hold on the seer’s neck, crimson blood trickling down Astor’s slender collar bone. It took a few moments for Astor to catch his breath before he could speak.  
“Huff huff...I think that was the best huff sex I’ve had yet…” He wheezed out, laying his still damp head down on the cool earth.  
“You did amazing as always.” Link purred, nipping the tip of his husband’s tapered ear; Astor twitched it on instinct. Seeing his partner in crime covered in his own spunk, Link plucked the washcloth from the water and started leisurely scrubbing his torso clean. He gently dabbed at and around the prophet’s scars, careful not to peel off any blackened skin.  
“I don’t think I’ll be able to walk for a bit. You’re too good at railing me my dear.” Astor breathed out a chuckle. Link laughed a bit himself.  
“We still have several hours until sunrise. I’m sure no one will bother us this far from town.” He gestured to the pale moon still high overhead.  
“See why I wanted to bathe here?”  
“Why? So we could fuck in peace?” Astor only answered with a wink and a devilish grin. He snaked his arm around Link’s toned abs and planted a kiss on his neck.  
“Perhaps… All I want at the moment is you in my arms. We can worry about the world later.” Link yawned and nodded, leaning into his husband’s chest as the two fell into a deep sleep. Hyrule and its many evils could wait.

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading, remember to check out the main fanfiction "The Intertwining of Light and Dark" for more content.


End file.
